Change is a process, not an event 💌

Hello beautiful human

Change is a process, not an event.

When we think about what we think we want, often the change needed is too big and too terrifying and has us standing still.

Yesterday was marks two years before I arrived in America, a seemingly big change - a seemingly big event - but the truth is, it only happened because of a thousand tiny courageous steps along the way.

I was working with a client this week and we were discussing courage. She didn’t feel like it was a word that was relevant for her. Maybe you’ve felt like this too.

Other people are courageous, and you are just quietly living your life feeling like that's not who you are.

Let me offer you a reframe.

The root of the word courage is cor – the Latin word for heart. In one of its earliest forms, the word courage meant ‘to speak one's mind by telling all one's heart.’

Courage is a heart word.

You have heart. A BIG one at that.

Big changes are seldom one big thing. They are the thousand courageous steps you took to get there, and keep taking each and every day.

They are the moments that you choose you, that you follow your heart.

When in came to moving to America, deciding to get married and building a life here, there were a thousand courageous steps that took me to that point.

1. Choosing to fly across the world to meet the random guy I’d met on Tinder in the pandemic.
2. Choosing to trust the unknown of being in a long distance relationship.
3. Choosing to come to America to see if it could all work the summer before - via quarantine in Mexico.
4. Getting ready for the potential of leaving my life in the UK behind.

I could go on, and each of those had a million component parts… but you get the idea.

In and amongst that, I was surfing the tide of fear and questioning in my internal world. Was I coming for a visit? Was it going to turn into something more? If it did, would I get a visa? Would it be okay with us being in the same country?

You get the idea.

I was so nervous when my flight left the UK on January 21st 2022, not knowing what would happen next.

But as the flight left, I looked out the window and to my surprise, I could see the perfect shadow of the plane from the window. This perfect shadow was surrounded by a perfect rainbow circle. A little ball of light.

At that moment, I knew everything was going to be okay. No matter what happened in America or with my husband... I knew I was always going to be okay.

Each and every act of self choosing adds up to you being the bold, brilliant, brave badass that you and I both know you are.

To choose yourself is courageous.

To take ownership of your life is courageous.

To say no is courageous.

And some days, just showing up is the most courageous act of all.

And for you, dear reader, I can already see your shadow rising against an abundant sky, circled by a perfect rainbow. It’s all going to be okay, I promise you.

Big love